Start-up boss tells employee to 'de-couple income from work' when their checks start arriving late

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Apr 1, 2026 4:00 PM EDT

We're not Gwyneth Paltrow. We're not going to "consciously uncouple" from our paychecks.

One of the key factors that keeps most people showing up to work is money. Maybe they care about what they do. Maybe they have a passion for it. Maybe, just maybe, they would show up if there was no money on the line. But unfortunately, it costs money to live, and you have to spend your life doing something, so you're probably going to work for money. This is the basic function of having a job. You show up, give them your time, effort, and ideas, and in exchange, they give you money with which to live your life. If this fundamental mechanism falls apart, then where are we left? This fundamental part of job-hood falls apart more than you think it would, though. We all have different relationships to money, and sometimes that means that you underestimate how much it means to others. 

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  • An invoice laid out on a table
    via Unsplash+ (Behnam Norouzi)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Was told to 'de-couple income from work' when checks have been late

    I work for a startup where I basically wear 5 hats and am expected to do a lot of things. Pay is meh, but we're surviving. However, recently our leadership has been engaged in some weird game of roulette with our pay cycles. One month I got one check, next month two, then last month one check, and then current check was late for this month. It was explained as a 'glitch', and then a 'change in pay schedule', that was not announced to the rest of the company.
    via PipePistoleer
  • One of the founders called me and was kind of nonchalant about it, even giggled a few times. "My bad, don't worry if you don't see a pay run on time it's just a glitch." My coworker in a similar role told me he got the same call.
    via PipePistoleer
  • I told the guy I was pretty unhappy because they have me doing all of this stuff that would normally be like 3 separate people, and then can't pay me on a steady schedule, want me to travel, and I basically live life on the edge financially like a lot of Americans, struggling to save even $100 a month, while at the same time they flip-flop on objectives and requirements and work and I'm pretty sure everyone is Al-slopping each other.
    via PipePistoleer
  • Anyways, after I told him I was struggling with work load and just financially in general, and they made it worse, he literally told me "you have to de-couple the work from income." I was unsure of the meaning so I teased it out of him, and he literally meant I shouldn't worry about money so much and just focus on the work.
    via PipePistoleer
  • I learned later this dude is from extreme wealth and has probably never had to make the 'do I eat or do I pay rent' decision ever in his life......... Anyways. What else is new I guess.
    via PipePistoleer

  • For example, if you grew up wealthy, you probably don't fully understand the feeling of having to work for a living. Maybe you're used to the day-to-day of working a job, but you don't have the fear in your heart of losing your job, as some others might. This might mean you treat your job a little more lightly. You don't have the same fire under your seat. You might be an excellent worker, but you might fail to understand how your coworkers or employees feel. That's exactly what happened here, when a boss at a start-up revealed his hand when it came to attitudes about money. Start-ups can be famously touch-and-go jobs. Funding is often in the air, and they might not be as liquid as they need to be. But if you have people on the payroll, you'd better be confident that you can pay them. And you sure as heck can't expect people to work when they're not being compensated for it. But that's what was happening here, when one employee's spotty payment history revealed a larger culture around money in the workplace. The way they saw it, money was no laughing matter. The way their boss saw it, they needed to lighten up.

  • Commenters warned that this might be a sign of something bigger.

    schrutesanjunabe... The first sign that a business is about to fold is missed paychecks. It's been like that forever. Time to pack your stuff, bud.
    via schrutesanjunabe
  • hris4evar They're broke dude. Find a new job and don't pay for any travel expenses on your credit card
    via hris4evar
  • shades747 Oh so you can quit working and still expect the income?
    via shades747
  • doomerunicorn Missed payroll means the company is sinking. It's not a glitch. If I were you I'd get off that sinking ship before they find themselves unable to make payroll at all.
    via doomerunicorn
  • A woman does accounting on a table with documents strewn about
    via Unsplash+ (Curated Lifestyle)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Groundbreaking... "de-couple income from work" is genuinely the most unhinged thing a founder has ever said to an employee. thats not mindset advice thats just them telling you they cant make payroll. late checks at a startup means the money is gone dude, start job hunting yesterday
    via GroundbreakingMall54
  • 30Helenssayfuc... An employer who is this cavalier about paying people is not trustworthy. And you know this already, but the idea that income shouldn't be related to work is utter horseshit. We ALL work because we have to.
    via 30Helenssayfu**off
  • Next he'll tell you the company is "like a family," and if you don't know, that's a red alert to get the f out. This business is extremely shaky, and he's trying to keep you there until it collapses. You deserve stability. Update your resume and find something better.
    via 30Helenssayfu**off
  • gedvondur You work for a startup.....one that is too poorly funded to pay you for the above-and- beyond they are asking. I assume they offered you equity? If not, I don't see why you are still there. Now they are missing payroll. Likely they are toast and have lost their investor's money.
    via gedvondur
  • Begin a job search right now. You can always turn down an offer you get, but you will *need* this offer if the startup fails. Most startups fail. That's just the way it is. Oh, and save every text, IM, email and anything else you can, get it offsite and stored
    via gedvondur
  • away. Sometimes these startups end up being part of a fraud prosecution. Paper trail will exonerate you. Of course, don't do anything shady for them....they may ask. Don't do it even if they scream in your face, pound the table and fire you.
    via gedvondur
  • True_Ad_1167 You're letting him take advantage of you.
    via True_Ad_1167
  • Twelvth_T_Thistle De-couple your effort from this organization
    via Twelvth_T_Thistle
  • Ox_Must_Plow You need to find a new job as quickly as you possibly can.
    via Ox_Must_Plow
  • A woman writes something down on the computer in front of her at work
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • stormtreader1 Tell him you can decouple income from THIS work if your checks are late again. If you're seriously doing basically everything then they NEED you, use that
    via stormtreader1
  • ChefCurry YumY... This is what happens when businesses are experiencing cash crunch and can't pay their bills on time. Typically it gets worse not better. Start planning your exit.
    via ChefCurryYumYum
  • rillip Missing paychecks is a major red flag. Time to pull the eject lever.
    via rillip
  • maydayvoter11 Missing payroll is the sign of a failing company. Find a new employer.
    via maydayvoter11
  • MuchDevelopm... Start looking for another job. Paychecks not arriving on time means they are in serious trouble. Since it's happened more than once. I'd stop showing up until my check arrived. Then it would only be to cash it. Start clearing out your desk. Because someday soon. You'll arrive to find locked doors. Good luck.
    via MuchDevelopment7084
  • omghorussaveu... i'm going to go out on a limb and say that your company isn't making much money and the top brass are paying themselves before everyone else. also likely, the top brass are robbing the company blind.
    via omghorussaveusall
  • Ok-Return7750 I've done payroll (or been involved in it) my entire working life (50 years) and missing pay runs is not a glitch. I agree with everyone else - time for you to get another job,
    via Ok-Return7750
  • Radiant Resear... The only reason to stay in this situation is if you have all of the following: (a) have a serious stake in the company that will pay off big time if they're successful, (b) you have every reason to believe they will be successful, and (c) you don't need the money to survive. It doesn't sound like you have any of these, but even if one is missing it's time to go.
    via Radiant_Research579
  • bgufo "you have to de-couple the work from income." ... well you have some company assets that you can sell on ebay
    via bgufo
  • scolphoy I guess "decouple income from work" usually means you should create sources of passive income, so that your livelihood is not dependent on you doing work, and conversely so that money is not such an acute concern that having to wait for your paycheck sometimes would be a big deal.
    via scolphoy
  • Just throwing it like that to someone who works their a off while strugging to make ends meet sounds pretty unhinged.
    via scolphoy

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employment issues antiwork employee start up start ups overworked-employees paycheck payment
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